Some Anniversaries Are Not Worth Celebrating

February 25, 2013 | By Adrienne Smith

This past Saturday, the 23rd, was the 10th anniversary of my Dad’s passing. It still seems like yesterday because every single little detail is still so vivid in my mind. It took me 2 years to deal with the way he passed because it wasn’t something you would wish on your worst enemy.

The pain isn’t as fresh anymore but don’t get me to talking about it because the flood gates will open back up and I’m a goner.

This post isn’t about mourning his loss though I wanted to celebrate his life.

I’ve written about him before and am still very proud of that post. Most of my readers have heard me speak of him often so I thought what better post to write today then to share with you who my Dad was.

I asked my Mom to put some things in writing for me so I’d have my facts a little more straight then me just winging it so here it goes…

Born In The Depression

My Dad was born John Frank DeCell, Jr. on November 18, 1922. He was born in the family home, 17 miles from town in rural Mississippi. There were no cars back then, only wagons and the doctor lived two miles down the road.

In the spring of 1923 he caught pneumonia and wasn’t expected to live. Throughout my Dad’s life we were told that many times, that he wouldn’t make it, but our reply was always the same. You don’t know my Dad.

Not only did he make it but he lived to be 80 years old. It wasn’t a healthy life he lived because from that moment on in 1923 you name it he caught it and was always sicker than anyone else. He was even held back from starting school because he was sick once again. By the time he started first grade he was nearly eight years old.

School In The Country

He attended a one room school with eight grades taught by just one teacher. He use to ride his horse to school and it would take him almost an hour to get there.

He didn’t live in what we think of as a neighborhood because it was way out in the country. They had hired help that lived on the property so their children were the only ones he played with.

He was raised on a cotton farm and they also grew tomatoes. Later on though my grandmother raised cattle and sold them.

When he finished the 7th grade he was sent to Jackson to live with his aunt for a year so they could have his teeth fixed. I remember seeing photos of him at a young age and bless his heart, they were horrible.

Grades 9 through 11 he was sent to Wesson where he boarded at the local high school which also doubled as a junior college. He played the clarinet in the band and actually held down several jobs.

He took care of the music room by setting up chairs and taking special care of the music and keeping the room clean. He worked in the cafeteria, he worked on a farm pitching hay, he threw the newspaper and he played in a band.

He and some friends snuck out at night to play at a local camp because my Dad had the key to the music room. They would collect their instruments and then return them that night so the teacher wouldn’t know they had been gone. They were paid a whole $1.50 each for playing.

World War II

My Dad was only 17 when the war broke out in 1939. He enlisted with some of his friends but his Dad got wind of it and immediately put a stop to that.

His Dad went to the draft board and asked if he could wait until the summer to serve because he had already paid tuition for him to attend school and he knew he would lose his money.

After that particular semester he joined the navy because he preferred to ride on a ship then do a lot of marching. He was part of the rifle drill team and they did a lot of performing on the base and for different occasions.

Radar was invented around that time so the government sent him to the first radar school to learn how to operate it. After he finished school he was assigned to a tug boat type ship they used to rescue Russian and US boats that were sinking in the Aleutian Islands.

He got out of the service in 1946 and came back to Mississippi.

After The War

He thought he was so smart and he didn’t need to go back to college so he got a job selling insurance. Unfortunately, he tried to look up some premiums and couldn’t find them so he got to thinking that he wasn’t as smart as he thought he was.

He enrolled in Mississippi State and had the same jobs he did while in junior college. They had a dance band but this time he didn’t have to sneak out in order to play.

He graduated in 1948 with a B.S. degree and got a job with a company called McKesson & Robbins. He flipped a coin to decide whether he would work in Houston, Texas or Little Rock, Arkansas and Houston won.

Once he received his training he was handling the territory in Houston and then also in Jasper, Texas. That’s where he met my Mom.

Their first date was a blind date. They dated, courted and were married within just six months. Mom carried ivy’s as her bouquet and still has it. She gave me a cutting so it’s now 63 years old. How cool is that!

After they were married he was assigned another territory so they moved to Baytown. That’s where they settled down and had three children. My sister Debbie is the oldest, I’m the middle and I have a younger brother named John.

Can you guess which one is me?

The First Dose Of Cancer

In 1958 when my brother was only six weeks old my Dad was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer called Metastasis Epimyolpitheld Carcinoma.

This type of cancer attacks the weakest part of your body so his first bout attached itself to his parotid gland. He was told there were only 22 other cases known with this type of cancer. Chemo and radiation did not even phase it so surgery was their only option. Unfortunately they had all died after six months. He was given the dreaded news to get his things in order.

After they operated he couldn’t close his eye nor move his mouth. His face was completely paralyzed on one side. They ended up doing surgery twice just to make sure they removed it all. They were still hoping for the best.

He was a father of three young children and wasn’t ready to check out just yet. He’s one very persistent guy so he kept exercising his face until one day everything just started moving again and as you already know, he lived on.

A Golfing Nut

My Dad loved to play golf. He traveled during the week as a salesman so you know they love to do business on the golf course. That was right up his alley.

Every minute he was home that’s where you could find him. He got his handicap down to a 6.

We moved into an addition called Country Club Oaks when I was 8 and the golf course was at the end of our block. He eventually purchased a golf cart for two reasons. He couldn’t walk as far as he use to due to being tired out more often and he hated paying the cart fees.

Mom decided over time that if she ever wanted to see Dad when he was home that she better learn to play golf. She not only learned but over time ended up beating him. Boy, he hated that.

Life As He Knew It

His next surgery came along in 1967 when he complained of a horrible stomach ache. He went to the doctor and they immediately admitted him and took him to surgery. His appendix were on the verge of exploding.

In 1975 Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer and it was the same type so he was scheduled for surgery where they removed it all.

In 1979 he had another lung operation and in 1992 they operated on his chest to remove some cancerous scar tissue and all the tumors that were forming.

He was told at that time that between both of his lungs he only had one really between him since they took out part of each one with those three surgeries. They told him they couldn’t operate again on his lungs or he wouldn’t have any at all.

After that last surgery he still had a few more. He had his gallbladder removed as well as a hernia. He also had a slight heart attack after the first surgery which we all felt was brought on from all that worrying whether he was going to be able to provide for his family.

From 1986 until 1995 he volunteered at M.D. Anderson Cancer Center. What better way to give back then to help those who were going through what he had gone through. Doctor’s could tell you what to expect but they hadn’t actually been through it themselves.

He was heavily involved with the Anderson Network which helped patients connect with others who had been through the same ordeal. He also helped patients who came to M.D. Anderson from small towns and were very overwhelmed with the size of the facility and where they needed to go.

One thing my Dad never did was complain. When other patients would ask him why they were stricken with cancer he would ask them to walk with him. He took them down to the children’s ward and then asked them, why the children. No one ever said anything again.

The next news that was given him was that he had Parkinson’s disease. The good news was that he wouldn’t be shaking on the outside, the bad news was that he would be shaking on the inside.

He still played golf during all this time but the tournaments they use to play in ceased after that. They had a ton of trophies that they had won individually and between them. They traveled a lot too to different places just to play and he was most proud to say he’s played at Pebble Beach and birdied the 18^th hole with people watching. Oh yeah, he had proof!

Remembering My Dad

My Dad had the best sense of humor. He was a practical joker and boy could he make us laugh. He was always telling stories about what his Dad use to do back on the farm. I never got tired of hearing him tell those.

At his service the stunts that he use to pull on his friends were being told on him and I know he was laughing while looking down from heaven.

We had a memorial for him to celebration his life. We had big band music playing, we set up a table in the front of the church with all of Dad’s favorite stuff laid out, we had his golf clubs set up and I put a photo album together for him for his 80th birthday going back over his entire life. Everyone enjoyed looking through that one. That’s where I got all these pictures!

That particular day we had an ice storm so some of our family didn’t make it to the service but it was still standing room only. We had so many people telling us how he had helped them through some of the most difficult times of their lives.

He was a great man, a true inspiration and one man that I’m truly proud to call my Dad.

Thank you for letting me share this with you today, it means the world that you read this to the end.

If your parents are still with you, please give them a hug or call them to tell them how much you love them. One day that will no longer be possible. One day you’ll be having this anniversary that is definitely not worth celebrating.

{ 131 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Koundeenya Twitter: Koundeenya February 25, 2013 at 8:17 AM

Hey Adrienne!

A pleasure, reading this article about your dad.

I loved the house your dad was born in. Its so pleasant and friendly to be in.

It’s always lovely being with parents. I love my mom. She’s so caring, fun to be with and my best friend. She never stops me from anything. I love her so much. Right now, I’m living away from my parents for more than an year and for the rest of my life, the same will go on. After my studies, my further studies, job and finally when I settle, we come together. The feeling of missing something comes only when we come to know the value.

Sad to hear that your dad was affected with such a cancer.

Thank you
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2 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 8:40 AM: Hi Koundeenya,

Thank you for stopping by and reading this post today Koundeenya. It means a lot, he was a wonderful man and I can’t believe he’s been gone 10 years now. His story should be one of triumph and conquering the impossible. Something we can all learn to do.

Glad to hear you’re so close to your Mom, so am I. I was close to both of them actually but as you know, my Dad is no longer with us.

Value your family Koundeenya and love them always.

Thank you for your lovely comment and you enjoy the rest of your week.

~Adrienne

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3 Paul February 25, 2013 at 8:20 AM

It took about ten years to quit wanting to go to the phone and call both Mom and Dad after they had passed. I was lucky in that I got the chance to tell them both I loved them before they were gone. Thank God for photos and the memories. Have a great week and thanks for sharing

4 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 8:41 AM: I have another friend that’s had that same experience. I guess because it took me 2 years to deal with his passing that I never had that urge. I was way too aware that he was gone. Luckily I still have my Mom so I’m thrilled about that. Sorry to hear you’ve lost them both Paul.

I appreciate your comment and thank you for reading this post. It means a lot.

~Adrienne

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5 Harleena Singh Twitter: harleenas February 25, 2013 at 8:20 AM

I have no words today Adrienne…

Your posts just got to me and I just can’t help these falling tears…

Ah…such Anniversaries surely aren’t worth celebrating, yet these are so much part of life, and something that’s going to happen to all of us one day. Yes, just as I keep saying so often – value and love your parents while they are still around for you can never tell about tomorrow, when it becomes too late.

Your father was a true inspiration, Adrienne. He’s gone so much through his life, and yet we complain when we have to undergo a little – isn’t it? I loved going through each line of this post and was lost in the wonderful pictures. I guess your Mom must have told you all about the past days, especially of the World Wars. It made me remember my Mom, whom as you know, I lost years back too, and how she would go into a trance when she spoke of my Dad and their times together. It brought back all those memories to me too.

Like your Dad, even my Dad loves playing golf and to date he never misses going every single day, even though now as he’s aging and has a back problem, doctor’s have advised him to go slow, but as they say – he’s another father like yours who says – never die right till the end.

As I’d mentioned in my post about my Dad long back if you remember, there are lessons each of our parents give us knowingly or unknowingly. And as I was reading through, I could make out so many of those hidden things that have come onto you from your Dad, even though you might not realize it. So, there’s always something to be grateful for – isn’t it? Even when they leave us, they leave us rich with their teachings.

About the picture – you surely are the one on the right most side with the lovely smile that you still carry with you – isn’t it? I could make out the moment I saw it – because of your infectious smile that puts an instant smile on our face.

Be well dear friend and take heart. We all sail in the same boat and miss our parents as much as you do. If you can perhaps feel what I feel for you presently, though know that our parents though not with us – are always with us in spirit and as our guardian angels.

Thanks for sharing a major part of yourself with all of us. I loved this post most of all
Harleena Singh recently posted..10 Reasons Your Kids Don’t Listen to You

6 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 8:50 AM

Hi Harleena,

I’m so so sorry Harleena, I didn’t mean to make you cry! I think that just goes to show the kind of person that you are with such a big heart.

Yep, as this one approached I still have that feeling that I can’t believe he’s been gone this long. He’s still a big part of all of our lives and Mom talks about him all the time. I have photos of him on my shelf and he’s a memory that will always be there for me.

Dad told us a lot about the days in the war, he always had some storied but this post would have ended up so big I might have lost even more people. Not sure everyone will actually read this one since it’s not about teaching anything. My Dad was a terrific story teller but my Mom does continue to share stuff with me that I’ve never heard which I always find surprising to this day.

Once Dad was diagnosed with Parkinson’s you could say his golf game went downhill. He didn’t care though, he still loved to play even though he was nowhere near as good as he use to be. The day that he fell which started his downhill spiral, he was getting up to go get dressed to play golf. At 80 years old and in horrible health he was still playing golf.

You are so right and that’s the post I had written about him back in 2011. I shared some of the lessons I had learned through him so you’re right about that Harleena. There are still some that I’m probably not even aware of.

You’re absolutely right, I think I was born smiling. We have a lot of pictures of me at a younger age just beaming.

Thank you Harleena for sharing this and I know you miss your Mom like I miss my Dad. But we each have a parent left that we cherish so we’ll continue doing so even after they pass.

I appreciate you taking the time to read this one today, it means the world.

~Adrienne

7 Carolyn Twitter: wonderoftech February 25, 2013 at 7:38 PM

Harleena, I was reminded of your eloquent tribute to your father as I read this touching celebration of Adrienne’s dad. It takes a very special man to raise such amazing women!
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8 Harleena Singh Twitter: harleenas February 25, 2013 at 9:16 PM

Thanks Carolyn for remembering that one…it was a special one and something I went back to soon after reading this one of Adrienne’s

And Adrienne, you don’t have to say sorry because I am an emotional person and just felt weepy as it brought back memories too. I guess losing a parent is never easy.

Thanks to both of you
Harleena Singh recently posted..Why Do We Sleep – A Lesson to Learn

9 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:15 AM: I also remember that wonderful tribute to your Dad as well Harleena. I’ve often times gone back and read my other one too. Especially when he’s heavy on my mind.

Just glad you’re okay Harleena and they were good tears.

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10 Pauline Twitter: PaulineBennett2 February 25, 2013 at 8:25 AM

Hi Adrienne
What a wonderful man your dad sounded, and thanks for sharing his story with us. Both my parents passed away quite a few years ago so I know how you feel, but if we have happy memories of our loved ones then we can remember them with a smile
I can tell by your story that your dad was a fighter and he wanted to stay with his family as long as he could.
Pauline
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11 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 8:52 AM: Hi Pauline,

Thank you for your wonderful comment Pauline and I’m sorry you’ve lost both of your parents. I guess I’m fortunate to have my Mom still here with me and now living right next door. That’s a true blessing so I intend to help her live as long and a healthy life as possible.

I do have wonderful memories of my Dad and we are just so blessed we had him as long as we did.

Thanks for stopping by and you enjoy your week.

~Adrienne

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12 Josh Twitter: thejoshuawilner February 25, 2013 at 8:26 AM

Hi Adrienne,

Based on the picture I am going to guess you were born smiling and never stopped. I think your father would be proud of you and that you produced a great tribute here.

Obviously I never knew your father but I have a strong feeling now about who he was and what it must have been like to spend some time with him.

I am a big fan of writing posts like this and taking the time to make sure stories about the important people in our lives aren’t forgotten.

I am sorry about the anniversary but I am glad to have had the opportunity to get to know your father a little bit better.
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13 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 8:56 AM: Hi Josh,

I tell people that I’ve always had a big mouth! lol… I do think I was born smiling. I think you’re right that he would be proud although he might be cringing about some of the photos I’ve shared. He was a really funny guy.

I had a lot of friends of mine that came to his memorial service and had not really met him before. After hearing everyone’s stories about him they came up to me afterwards and said that they felt like they’ve always known him. He was that kind of guy so that made me very happy.

I appreciate that you enjoy these types of posts Josh and that you took the time to read it. I thought what better time to share who he was then on the 10 anniversary of his passing. He’ll never be forgotten to his friends and family so at least my readers now have a sense of who he was and why I am the way I am. We know we inherit things from our parents but we also have all those lessons we get to learn along the way.

Thank you again Josh for your awesome comment and your very kind words. I’m glad you had a small glimpse of who my Dad was. He would be very happy about that.

~Adrienne

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14 sapna Twitter: h4hitech February 25, 2013 at 8:38 AM

HI Adrienne,

The post clearly suggests that your father was really great who didn’t give up even though he face adversities one after the another. A cancer survivor who could live so long when even when at that time there was no chemo and radiotherapy. A word cancer can kill anyone but your father – A fighter, after so many surgeries appear to be very healthy in the photos while he was alive.

Now coming to the your photograph, I guess one who is laughing is YOU, am I correct?

Thanks for sharing and I’m very happy to know about your father which otherwise wouldn’t have been possible.

~Sapna
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15 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:10 AM

Hi Sapna,

Thank you for saying that Sapna, he was a true survivor. They did have chemo and radiation back then but they went that route on the other patients which is why they had reverted to surgery. Nothing got rid of that particular type and all the ones before him didn’t survive the surgery either. He definitely wasn’t going to let cancer beat him and in the end the doctor’s even told him that would not be what he would die from and it wasn’t.

You are most definitely correct, that’s me on the end with the big old smile.

I appreciate you reading my post Sapna, thank you so much.

~Adrienne

16 sapna Twitter: h4hitech February 25, 2013 at 9:19 AM

HI Adrienne,

10 full point to me for guessing YOU correct in the photograph.

Thanks, just trying to change your mood.

Sapna
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17 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:25 AM: You’re right Sapna, 10 points for you.

Oh, my mood is fine. Had some heavy moments on Saturday but then spent Sunday with family so it was fun. The pain isn’t as fresh but I can never forget him. Never!

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18 Sylviane Nuccio Twitter: SylvianeNuccio February 25, 2013 at 8:45 AM

Wow, Adrienne, you made me tear up on that one!

What a wonderful man you father was! So many people would have given up on life with less than half of the health issues he went through. Man, he was strong both mentally and physically.

Through your words we can certainly feel how much you loved your father, and I can tell that you took lots after him

I loved those pictures of yours, and what a cute picture with your brother and sister. You were already laughing just the same as you do now.

Thank you for sharing your incredible dad’s life with us, Adrienne.
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19 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:15 AM: Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean too!

Mom told me that when he got the news of the first cancer scare back in 1958 that my grandmother was staying with us to help Mom with the kids after my brother was born. She told Mom to go be with my Dad and he was curled up in bed just crying. She laid down with him and they cried together but after he got that out of his system he was ready to fight. He had a great life with three young children and wasn’t ready to give up. I know that your faith has a lot to do with it so thank goodness for that.

I most definitely did Sylviane, I love them both. They are wonderful people who are the strongest people I’ve ever met. They’ve both been through so much and one day I’ll get a chance to write about my Mom.

Yep, that’s me alright and it’s my favorite photo of all of us. See how chubby I was!

I appreciate your comment Sylviane, thank you so much. It means the world to me that you read it all the way through. ♥

~Adrienne

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20 Vidya Sury Twitter: vidyasury February 25, 2013 at 8:54 AM

Dear Adrienne, A huge warm hug to you. Naturally, I feel very emotional reading your post. I lost my Mother in Feb 2010 and miss her every moment. We were the best of friends – she was a single parent and we were just a little less than 18 years apart. We went through mostly tough times, but laughing, cheerful. I am grateful I have her in my heart.

I can feel your love for your Dad. You’re blessed to have memories. God bless.

With Love, Vidya
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21 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:18 AM: Hi Vidya,

Oh, I’m so very sorry for your loss and I wish I could say I don’t know how you feel but it’s obvious that I do. Thank goodness for all our memories right! Wow, she was so young when she passed too. That’s always so very hard. Although my Dad had a heck of a life fighting all these illnesses we had him for a long time. Longer then any of us thought we would so it was a blessing actually. Losing a parent when they’re younger is so hard.

I appreciate you reading my post and sorry if it upset you and brought back memories. I appreciate it though Vidya.

~Adrienne

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22 Maxwell Ivey Twitter: mistermidway February 25, 2013 at 9:05 AM

Hello; thanks for sharing your father and your memories of him with us. He sounds like a great man. what he said about the navy and marching reminded me of my own dad. he always used to tell us boys that if there is ever a draft go right down and inlist in the navy or the air force. he said they have better food and are a lot less dangerous than being a soldier. he died of cancer six winters ago at the john ceily hospital in galveston. i never tired of hearing his stories and miss him a lot. he taught be a lot about how to live during our endless trips on the road together. my family owned a small carnival and some weeks me and him would make three or four trips trying to get everything moved. lot of country music, conversation, and bad food. smile thanks again and take care, Max
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23 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:20 AM

Hi Max,

Thanks for sharing that with me about your Dad. Sounds like you two had a great time together and lots of fun. I know what you mean and sorry he lost his battle with cancer. He wasn’t far from us being here in Houston.

I appreciate you sharing that with me Max and thank you so much for your wonderful comment.

~Adrienne

24 Maxwell Ivey Twitter: mistermidway February 25, 2013 at 9:31 AM

Hi adrian; sounds like we are both sharing good memories today. i grew up in spring, and i now live in conroe with my youngest brother patrick, his son seth, my mom, and our crazy dog penny. i sometimes think that if i were going to believe in reencarnation i would have to believe penny has at least some of my dad’s spirit in her. she is always making us laugh even when she is doing things that frustrate us like letting herself in and not closing the door behind herself. my dad used to say he was keeping us young. smile glad i’ve also figured out your comment form. the twitter box was throwing me. thanks again and take care, max
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25 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:38 AM: Really! I didn’t realize you lived so close to me. I’m in the Galleria and have been here for over 20 years now. Mom lives in the condo next door to me, we’re selling her home in Baytown.

Thank you for sharing that with me Max, I love hearing about where you are and Penny! I know that my Dad is up there with Blake, my Cocker Spaniel, and they’re having a grand old time. Knowing they’re together means the world to me. He loved that dog.

~Arienne

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26 Darnell Jackson Twitter: freedommmc February 25, 2013 at 9:09 AM

This is really cool Adrienne,

Thanks for sharing this.

The problem with our society is simple:

We’ve forgot where we come from.

We need to go back to our OLD traditions.

Our elders were right, “There’s nothing new under the sun.”
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27 Hiten Twitter: stutteringhub February 25, 2013 at 9:17 AM

Hi Adrienne,

Your post was such a lovely tribute to your father. It was beautiful. He sounds like a truly inspirational person and someone who may have suffered so much, yet always had a smile on his face.

I lost a cousin to cancer last year and what you wrote about your dad reminded me of him. My cousin had a number of serious illnesses throughout his life before he got cancer. Yet, I never heard him complain even once about his conditions and he was always cheerful.

Thank you.
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28 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:24 AM: Hi Hiten,

Thank you, I appreciate your kind words. I’m so sorry about your cousin and he sounds a lot like my Dad. He never complained and took things in stride. He had his moments though don’t get me wrong. Throughout the years he lost a lot of friends he had come to know real well that volunteered with him at M.D. Anderson. He had a hard time there for awhile understanding why they lost the battle and he was still here. It’s a hard thing to deal with.

Thank you for sharing that with me Hiten and I’m so sorry for your loss. I wish everyone could live their lives to a ripe old age and pass of natural causes. That’s the way life should be.

~Adrienne

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29 Ehsan Ullah Twitter: GuideAndNews February 25, 2013 at 9:27 AM

Woa Adrienne, This is so much more than just another article that teaches something regarding online success.

This is really an inspiring story that everyone should read till the end, and I must say that your Dad was a great man truly. I’m so lucky to have both my mom and dad with me, and being able to show my love to them.

About the picture, you’re the one at the left hand side of John with big smile on your face, isn’t it?

Thanks for sharing a story of a great man and a part of your life with us.
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30 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 9:32 AM: Why thank you Ehsan, I appreciate that. I think a lot of people can learn about never giving up through what my Dad has been through in his life.

I’m so happy to hear you still have both your parents with you. I’m sure you tell them all the time just how much you love them. Ah, hug them till you can’t anymore Ehsan and remember all these moments you have with them. Enjoy they now!

Yep, that’s me and you guessed that right. Hard to tell right!

I appreciate your kind comment Ehsan, thank you so much.

~Adrienne

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31 Steve Borek Twitter: steveborek February 25, 2013 at 10:18 AM

Wow, if he was a 6 handicap, he was an excellent golfer.

They say we all have cancer cells and then other things come into the equation that makes them active. Environment, foods, etc.

I can tell you love and miss your Dad.

Very touching post Adrienne. Thanks for sharing.

32 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 10:23 AM: He was for a good number of years Steve and he had a ton of trophies to prove it. He and Mom both over the years, they were awesome!

We all do have cancer cells Steve, you’re right. It’s how we treat our bodies and the things we come in contact with that will make them become active or not. There are so many different variables that come into place. I’m sure since he was a sickly child that his immune system wasn’t the best no matter how well he took care of himself.

I most definitely do Steve, thank you so much for your kind words.

I appreciate you reading this post today and if your parents are still with you, give them a call. I know they’d appreciate it.

~Adrienne

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33 Theodore Nwangene Twitter: Nwangenetheodor February 25, 2013 at 10:42 AM

What a touching story about your Dad Adrienne.

I really enjoyed reading it to the end. From your story, your dad was really a man of vigor indeed and he’s such a father that everyone will like to have.

And you’ve really done very well to put all these together, not everyone knows much about their Dad as you do, Kudos.

But what else can i say? Such is life and we must embrace whatever it comes with. I’m sure he’ll still be a very happy man wherever he is now. May his soul continue to rest in the bosom of our lord.

I also love my parents a lot, there the best thing that has happened to me. I will have to call them now and tell that i love them.

Thanks for sharing.

BTW: Why did you opened your mouth on the picture while your siblings closed theirs? Lol
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34 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 10:53 AM: Thank you Theodore, glad you enjoyed what I shared.

My Dad was one of a kind. He wasn’t always there for us because he traveled all the time for work and then when he was home he was on the golf course. But over time we grew to understand him and respect him. I think that’s probably how it is with a lot of parents.

I know that he’s in a much better place now and very healthy enjoying the remainder of what the Lord has in store for him. He’s looking down on us and still watching over my Mom. That I do know for sure.

I’m so happy to hear you’re close to your parents and I’m sure they’d appreciate a phone call Theodore. That’s so thoughtful of you.

By the way, I know the photographer was telling us to smile and I have no problem in that area. I can’t speak for my sister or brother. lol..

Enjoy your week.

~Adrienne

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35 Babanature February 25, 2013 at 10:53 AM

Hello Adrienne,
I truly feel your post, it has a lot of feelings and reminiscing. Here’s a warm hug from me to you. You just made me remembered my paps (bless his soul). Thanks
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36 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 10:56 AM

Hi Babanature,

Thank you and I appreciate you reading it till the end. It’s my tribute to my beloved Dad.

I’m sorry for your loss as well. It’s never enjoyable losing a loved one.

~Adrienne

37 Babanature February 25, 2013 at 12:03 PM: Thanks, It’s never nice loosing the one you loved. the hardest part is when they go without saying goodbye.
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38 Mitch Mitchell Twitter: mitch_m February 25, 2013 at 11:14 AM

My wife always says that the fathers make the girls, and it’s really true here as you have your father’s smile. Man, I love stories like this, and I think it’s a real tribute to our parents when we have the opportunity to celebrate, rather than mourn, them when we get to these seminal anniversary dates. Thank you for sharing this legacy of your father; we’ll both do this in another 10 years.
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39 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 11:22 AM: Thanks Mitch, I knew you’d appreciate this one. We’ve talked about this before and I knew I would write one on this anniversary.

I think your wife is right and I do have a lot of his characteristics. I definitely have that droopiness in my face but I have my Mom’s eyes. Weird combination.

He was someone that definitely we needed to celebrate his life instead of mourn. Even during the rough patches Mom and I went through after his death I knew he would be upset with me for feeling that way but it couldn’t be controlled. He would definitely want me to do some celebrating so that’s how we honored him at his memorial. It was a special day for sure.

Glad you enjoyed this post Mitch, I appreciate you taking the time to read it. Yeah, I’m not looking forward to saying it’s been 20 years. Ouch!

Thanks Mitch, it means a lot. ♥

~Adrienne

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40 Vickie Twitter: Horsemarkcards February 25, 2013 at 11:23 AM

Adrienne,
What a wonderful post honoring your dad. It is nice to have so many wonderful memories to keep him close to your heart. I am sure some of his qualities are also in you. Your profile pictures with your great smile says so much. I also met my husband on a blind date, married him 7 months later and have been married 29 years. I lost my mom in 2010 and it is difficult, but thank goodness we do have our good memories of them. Thanks you so much for sharing this personal story, I know many people were touched by it.
Keep your memories close and keep that smile!
Hugs! Vickie
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41 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 11:34 AM: Hi Vickie,

Thank you, I appreciate that! I think my brother and I inherited his big sense of humor, his smile for sure.

Wow, you and your husband met on a blind date and married 7 months later. That’s amazing Vickie and see, there can be a happily ever after. Mine were married 52 years when my Dad passed away. They married a little later in life then most kids did back then.

I’m sorry you lost your Mom but I hope you have just as many wonderful memories of her as I do of my Dad. Those will never die along with all the great photos we have.

I appreciate you sharing that with me and thank you for reading my post today. It means a lot.

Hugs coming back your way girl!

~Adrienne

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42 Mary Stephenson Twitter: maryjstephenson February 25, 2013 at 11:25 AM

Hi Adrienne

What a wonderful tribute to your amazing Dad. Our problems seem so little when you describe how the struggle of health was to him.

My mother passed in 1986 from liver cancer and I am sure she had it awhile before she ever told anyone that there was something wrong. She was like that, when she finally spoke up and sought help, they could do nothing for her and gave her 3 months. Which was about all she had. My dad suffered many years with leukemia, he would be fine and then end up with fluid in his lungs and be hospitalized for periods of time. He finally passed in 1989 some 22 years after the diagnosis.

We sometimes take our families for granted until we are faced with the reality. My brother has a seizure yesterday, he is fine now but they don’t know why he had one. It really sucks getting older and knowing at any moment our lives can change dramatically.

Thanks for the heart warming post.

Mary
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43 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 11:38 AM: Hi Mary,

You are so very right and he use to tell me that all the time. I would call him and complain about something and he would tell me that I could by laying in a hospital bed dying of cancer. He made my complaining seem so small.

I’m so sorry you lost both your parents so long ago. Wow, you were so young then. Those sound like horrible ways to go and I don’t wish that on anyone Mary. Please know my thought and prayers are with you.

I know a lot of people who do take their families for granted. They will have a hard time dealing with the loss when that comes and realize they never had a chance to tell them how they really felt. I’ve seen it to often but luckily that wasn’t me.

You’re right, it’s no fun getting older especially when the body starts having issues. I hope your brother will be okay and I would be worried why that even happened. I hope they can get a handle on this.

Thank you for your comment Mary, I appreciate it.

~Adrienne

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44 Donna Merrill Twitter: donna_tribe February 25, 2013 at 11:43 AM

Hi Adrienne,

What a beautiful story to celebrate life! When our loved ones pass, we (those left behind) have to go through our mourning period. But when you really think of it, it is a celebration of that persons’ life!

I love how he grew up because David’s family grew up in the same way, but in Maine. We visiting the little one room school house a few years back where his mom went to. It is difficult for that city gal in me to even imagine live back then in a rural atmosphere but it was amazing when we actually took the trip.

Now I know where you get your great sense of humor and your strength from! Seems like your dad was a very special man. He had no fear! He went on with his life facing the battles of illnesses with a great mindset. Oh that mind over matter philosophy is so illustrated when reading about his life.

He is an example for all of us to adhere to. Especially his volunteer work at the cancer center. I always think that if you can touch only one person to help in my life, I’ve done my job as a human being. Your dad has touched many!

I believe the most effective way people learn is through stories. Here, sharing your dad’s story has encouraged me so much. I look at those little problems I have, then look at his life and feel like “Hey, I can do it!” I received so much encouragement from this post. You have to know how healing it is.

I also have to thank your Dad for being that inspiration. May God Bless you and yours,
Donna

P.S. I guess you are the little girl on the right laughing in that picture! lol
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45 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 11:59 AM: Hi Donna,

You are right Donna.. For this particular loss, it shouldn’t have happened when it did which is why I was in such a bad way. But also being the daughter I mourned not ever being able to have a conversation with him again. Never being able to ask his advice or give him a hug. His life was truly worth celebrating but for those of us that weren’t ready for him to go was the hardest part.

Really, David grew up that way too! It was a culture shock for us. We took baths in well water that was more rusty then clean. Mom would pick the ticks out of our hair before we were allowed back in the house from being out playing in the woods. Lots of memories where Dad great up but it was fun. Very different though from what we know.

I wish he would have shared more of that with us when we were younger but I learned a lot of lessons but watching what he went through. He had a great sense of humor and I can’t top his but it’s close.

He did a lot of great things with his life Donna and he touched so many people outside of our family and friends. He has been honored in so many different ways and we have a plaque of him that was dedicated to him through his volunteer work at M.D. Anderson.

I’m so glad that his story was something you’ll remember. Anytime you feel “why me” think about everyone else who is a lot worse off. Why them!

Thank you Donna and God Bless you too young lady. I appreciate that.

~Adrienne

P.S. Oh yeah, you guess right!

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46 Bren Twitter: MyGrlyPrts February 25, 2013 at 11:48 AM

Adrienne,

This is absolutely heartwarming. Thank you so much for sharing your father’s journey with us. He seems to be a very admirable man. I’m sure he’s smiling down from heaven upon you and saying “What a beautiful daughter I have.”

I know what it’s like to lose parents. I lost my mother at age 11 and my father in my 30′s. It’s still not easy but rather than dwell on what I don’t have today, I prefer to think back on the memories and good times.

Hugs my friend.
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47 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 12:01 PM: Hi Bren,

Thank you, that’s so kind of you to say and I sure hope he’s smiling down at me. I know he knows how much I loved him but you can never stop staying that even years after they’re gone.

I’m so sorry you lost you Mom so early. That must have been so hard. You Dad didn’t live a long life either, I can’t even imagine what you went through Bren. I have so many friends who have lost their husbands at an early age leaving their young children behind. It’s so heart wrenching. My heart goes out to you.

We do have our memories though and they will never fade.

Thank you so much and hugs are coming back at ya.

~Adrienne

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48 Sonia Twitter: LogAllot February 25, 2013 at 11:49 AM

Your father truly enjoyed his life. I loved reading about his life and the journey he went on to live his life. Life was sure different back then, but I bet he could tell you some stories. I remember when my Grandma passed and how much I wished I asked those questions about her life and what she did growing up. All I remember was her sweet smile. You brought allot of that back for me today. I love how you celebrate your dad’s life and the story you can tell today. I bet your dad is looking down at you smiling.
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49 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 12:04 PM: Hi Sonia,

I believe he really did. He accepted what was given him and just made the best of it.

Girl, you have no idea. That man had stories and I never tired of hearing them either. He would have us rolling on the floor laughing or intrigued with what he was sharing. Life was so different when he was growing up so I learned how things were back then. We are truly blessed with what we have today because we never had it hard, not like they did growing up in the depression.

I had my Mom write down things about her life too. I want to remember it all and know that she shared that with me. She’s so full of knowledge and amazing stories too. I never tire of hearing them.

I’m glad I was able to help you bring back good memories Sonia.

Thank you for your kind comment, I really appreciate it. I hope Dad is smiling really big today.

~Adrienne

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50 Debbie Twitter: DebbieDoglady February 25, 2013 at 12:04 PM

Hello Adrienne;
Your Dad was truly a remarkable man! Amazing that he endured so many illnesses and survived cancer so many times. What a great fighting spirit he must have had. Love the photos as well and I believe you are on the right, as you said you were the middle child, yes?
Thanks so much for sharing this story. You have wonderful memories and I hope they can soften the pain of this anniversary.
Best Regards,
Debbie
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51 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 12:48 PM

Hi Debbie,

Thank you, I definitely believe he was too! He definitely went through hell and never expected to live as long as he did. I think God had some things in store for him though. He definitely had a fighting spirit that’s for sure.

Thank you and yep, that’s me on the end with my big mouth!

I appreciate your sweet comment Debbie, thank you so much. It means the world and this anniversary was one I wasn’t looking forward to but glad it’s behind me now.

~Adrienne

52 Debbie Twitter: DebbieDoglady February 25, 2013 at 1:12 PM

You’re welcome Adrienne and you must be relieved to have that day behind you. This post struck a nerve for me, as well. My father was diagnosed with lung cancer in Aug, 2010 and it turned out to be inoperable, (after they did an exploratory). Watched him waste away from this insidious disease and then die in Feb. 2011. He fought tooth and nail too, but the sad part was, he wouldn’t let anyone help him be more comfortable. Thankfully, the good memories are what linger the most as we deal with life’s tragedies. Have a good week, my friend.

53 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 1:24 PM: I am but I spent the day with my Mom so it was a good day!

I’m so sorry about your Dad Debbie. I understand because my Dad volunteered at M.D. Anderson so he had so many friends he had met and gone through a lot with lose their battle and it’s so hard. These were really wonderful people taken way before their time. He had a hard time understanding why he was still here and most of them were gone. Just like your Dad, why was his inoperable while so many other’s were treatable. Those are questions we’ll never have answered and I think we all have gone through that.

My Dad wasted away at the end of his life too Debbie, it was horrible. After everything he’d been through too to watch him leave this earth that way. No one should go through that ever. I’m so so sorry because I feel your pain.

We definitely have all the good memories though so I don’t dwell on how he left this earth anymore. He would hate that I remembered him in that way so I don’t anymore. He was so much more to me then that and I know your Dad was too.

Thank you for sharing that with me Debbie.

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54 Lisa Twitter: lisapatb February 25, 2013 at 12:12 PM

What an amazing person your dad was Adrienne. To go through all of those health issues and make it to 80. So inspiring! Your tribute started to make me tear up. But the picture of you and your siblings made me smile, you still have that same smile. Do you also play golf Adrienne? That’s nice that your mom learned to and they got to do that together. I feel very fortunate to have both my parents but know it can change in a flash.
Thanks for sharing your dad with us Adrienne. {hugs}
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55 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 12:55 PM

Hey Lisa,

Ah thanks, I know I’m just prejudice when it comes to my Dad.

I know Lisa, he never thought he would live to be that age. After almost every surgery he had they told us he might not make it. I can’t tell you how many times we heard that but he came through every single time. One surgery he was full of so much water weight we didn’t recognize him. It was horrible.

You liked my photos? I tried to pick the ones that related to what I was sharing but that’s my favorite photo of all of us. I have that one blown up and on my wall in my bedroom. I was a cute kid!

No I don’t play. Dad tried to teach me when I was younger and I kept missing the ball and tearing the grass up. He kept making me plant it back that they just dropped me off at the pool as they went to play golf. I was a sun worshiper, a pool gal. My brother plays but my sister and I never got the hang of it.

I’m glad you still have both your parents, you’re very fortunate Lisa. I have a feeling there will never be any words left unsaid between you and them when that time does come.

Thank you for your awesome comment and I’ve got hugs coming back your way!

~Adrienne

56 Lisa Twitter: lisapatb February 27, 2013 at 4:58 AM

Adrienne, I loved the photos, it’s nice to get to know you better via them. And I learned something new, didn’t think of you as a pool person after seeing you on the horse. I think they are things still unsaid, good reminder to not let that happen, thanks Adrienne.
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57 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 27, 2013 at 8:59 AM: Thanks Lisa, glad you enjoyed seeing these old photos.

Oh yeah, I use to be a sun worshiper. Of course I grew up outside and we had a trampoline too. Mom and Dad would drop me off at the pool while they played golf. I went on to love the sun and laying out and did that well into my early 40′s. I finally gave it up. I think the older I get the more uncomfortable I am in the heat so it’s not as enjoyable as it use to be. No more tan for this gal.

I use to ride horses when I was younger, my best friend had one and her neighbor so we use to ride all the time. I know how to ride rather well just hadn’t done it in ages. My sister-in-law has three now but one is very very old and the other is too young to even ride yet. We never got much of a chance to just go out and ride with her.

Glad you enjoyed my post Lisa, thanks!

~Adrienne

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58 Lori Gosselin Twitter: lifeforinstance February 25, 2013 at 12:30 PM

Aw Adrienne,
This was not only a hard life for your father, but a hard life for you! I can’t imagine enduring all these crises! We had 2.5 years of this with my mom’s cancer but you had all his life to bear such frights!
I think it’s great that you poured out this much of his story today. And look how many people care about you and wanted to come and hear it!
Hugs!
Lori
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59 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 1:04 PM: Hey Lori,

People often wonder why I continue to say how blessed I am and now you know. This was my life. Out of the 52 years my parents were married my Dad had illnesses 50 of those years. I was 1-1/2 when he was first diagnosed with cancer so we dealt with this all my life. M.D. Anderson was our second home because he had to have regular checkups like every 3 months and then they would graduate to every 6 months and then a year, etc.

I’m sorry to hear your Mom had cancer too. So did mine so it wasn’t just Dad. Yeah, my life wasn’t exactly the norm I guess you could say.

Thank you Lori for your nice comment, I appreciate that. I have so many wonderful people in my life and I’m so pleased that they let me share this today and stopped by anyway. No lessons learned today when it comes to blogging but perhaps about life instead.

Hugs are coming back your way!

~Adrienne

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60 Leora Twitter: leoraw February 25, 2013 at 12:45 PM

Amazing to read how much your father accomplished, how much he did despite illnesses, how much he was loved!

My father passed away this past fall. And my mother has been gone almost twenty years. It’s never easy. I find if I talk to those who haven’t experienced loss, they rarely get the emotions. I think it’s just too scary for some people to listen.

Take care, Adrienne.
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61 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 1:06 PM: Thank you Leora, I appreciate that you enjoyed what I shared about my Dad. He was a really great guy and boy was he ever loved.

I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve now lost both your parents. I’m dreading the day I lose my Mom, she’s been such a rock for me. I know what you mean though. People who haven’t been through it don’t truly understand, especially if they weren’t close to their parents. I’ve lost a lot of people throughout my life so I know exactly how precious life truly is.

Thank you for your wonderful comment Leora and God Bless!

~Adrienne

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62 Ruth Zive Twitter: rzive February 25, 2013 at 1:40 PM

Adrienne, I enjoyed the first post you wrote about your Dad, and I was just as eager to read through this one. He sounds like a wonderful and fascinating man. It also seems from the photographs that you look a lot like him! Clearly, you have inherited his zest for life and sense of determination.

I think it’s a gift to reflect on our ancestry and draw life lessons. So perhaps it’s not an anniversary that you are ‘celebrating’ per se, but an opportunity to reflect and learn. Anniversaries serve as reminders to that end.

Thinking of you and sending lots of love.
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63 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 1:58 PM: Hi Ruth,

Thank you Ruth, I was pretty proud of that first one I wrote a few years ago. I have tons of stories I could share but I just wanted to give everyone an idea of who he was and his life. He was a great guy and so much fun to be around. Never a dull moment and I did inherit that bottom portion of his face. I’m not sure if that’s a really good thing because his Mom was not an attractive women in her older age and he inherited it from her. I think I’m in trouble girl. lol…

I believe it’s a gift to remember our ancestry, you’re right. I look back on the way I was raised and how I grew up and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. We lived in a world where you didn’t worry about locking your doors, we went outside to play and our parents never worried about our safety, we could go out at night and never worry about not making it home okay. That was just the way things were, so simple back then. I know my parents felt the same way.

Thank you Ruth for your wonderful comment, I really appreciate it. I’m sending lots of love back your way girl! ♥

~Adrienne

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64 Ntathu Allen Twitter: yogainspiresyou February 25, 2013 at 2:16 PM

Adrienne, what a star and what a miracle making-living man. Your dad’s tenacity and endurance for life is infectious and he shines down and through your heart. Celebrate and be happy for the joy and lessons he gives. Thank you for sharing. Big hugs from across the pond.
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65 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 2:20 PM: Thank you Ntathu, I think he was too! Talk about never giving up or in, that was my Dad. I have definitely celebrated the lessons I’ve learned from him and I appreciate your kind words. Thank you so very much.

I appreciate your hugs and I’m sending some back you way too!

~Adrienne

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66 Robin Hallett Twitter: robinshallett February 25, 2013 at 2:56 PM

HI Adrienne,

Thank you for sharing your dad with all of us! I can totally see how you loved him and what a light he was to everyone he touched. And, this lives on in you dear Adrienne, you are such a light for us all here.

Thank you – the pictures are wonderful, it’s plain to see what an all around good person he was (and continues to be!) I am so glad you shared.

Hugs and love!

Robin
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67 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 3:03 PM: Hi Robin,

My pleasure and I’m glad you enjoyed his story! He was a great guy and did touch a lot of people while he was here. We talk about him often.

Glad you liked the photos, I had fun going back through that album I had done for him. There were plenty more good ones in there too!

Thanks Robin, I appreciate your wonderful comment. Hugs and love coming back your way too!

~Adrienne

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68 Enstine Muki Twitter: enstinemuki February 25, 2013 at 3:11 PM

OMG!
Thanks for sharing with us the beautiful story of your dad. I can see in him a man who would not give up. He must be very proud of you.

Oh! the picture. You were such a pretty little girl. So cute You do well to keep that pic for real
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69 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 3:13 PM: Why thank you Enstine, I appreciate that. I’m glad you enjoyed what I shared about his life. He was definitely no quitter so that’s a lesson we can all learn right!

You are to kind, I was a little chubby too. But I did love life even at that age. I have the larger version of that picture on my bedroom wall. Yep, it’s my favorite!

Thanks Enstine.

~Adrienne

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70 RobG Twitter: robgoss February 25, 2013 at 3:13 PM

Hello Adrienne, I must say what a wonderful post indeed, I can surely understand how you feel it’s never really easy loosing your parents.

Your dad seems like a very strong man and enjoyed life, I know sometimes we feel it’s so unfair but that’s why it’s so important to love them while we have them in out lives. Nothing can replace the love they have for us.

I lost my mom about 20-years ago it was my first Christmas with my wife, so around the holidays it’s kind of turf, and until today it still brings a tear to my eyes when I think about her because we were so close.

The easiest way to help ease the pain a little is to hold on to all the GREAT memories you had with him because they will last a life time.

God bless you and your family and for you sharing this wonderful story.
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71 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 3:17 PM: Hey Rob,

Thank you, glad you enjoyed it. It’s definitely not my normal type post but this was a special occasion, not worth celebrating though.

I don’t dwell on his loss anymore and he’s always remembered around our house. Mom still talks about Dad all the time so he’s always so fresh on my mind. We often wonder what he’d be thinking about certain things you know.

I’m sorry you lost your Mom so long ago. Wow, 20 years. That will be here before you know it for us too. We do have our wonderful memories though right!

Thank you Rob for your oh so kind comment, it’s greatly appreciated.

~Adrienne

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72 Sue Neal Twitter: write_clever February 25, 2013 at 4:01 PM

What a moving tribute to your Dad, Adrienne – I think you look very much like him from the photos – you both have an wonderful smile – and yes, we can tell which one is you in that picture of you with your brother and sister – no prizes for guessing that, right?

This brought up memories of my own Dad – he was always known as a ‘creaking gate’ because he should have died several times on his way to adulthood, surviving TB, radical mastoids that left him profoundly hard of hearing and an early heart attack. He always regarded himself as a medical miracle and was devastated when he was finally given a diagnosis of motor neurone disease, which the doctors couldn’t fix – but he made it to 79, only a year short of your Dad. He also loved golf – not sure if what his handicap was, though – I suspect your Dad would have thrashed him if they’d ever had a round.

You certainly seem to have inherited your Dad’s wonderful spirit and sense of humour – I hope you’ve shown this to your Mum – I’m sure it will bring tears to her eyes but make her very proud and happy too. Thanks so much for sharing your Dad’s amazing story – I hope he knew he had an amazing daughter – I’ll bet he did!

Sue
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73 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 4:20 PM

Hey Sue,

Thank you, I appreciate your kind words. I do look a lot like him but much prettier! My brother and I inherited his sense of humor so that’s very true. Yep, you guess right on that photo too! Surprise right!

Oh, your Dad sounds like he’s been through the ringer too! Bless his heart but never gave up did he! After everything my Dad went through, learning he had Parkinson’s was not the way to go out either. Oh and he was also hard of hearing in the end too, so is my Mom and so am I.

In Dad’s younger days he was a really good golfer but those surgeries took it out of him. He still enjoyed the game very much though, I’m sure your Dad did too.

Mom helped me write it actually and I had her read it twice. She came back with a few more things and I had to remind her of a few things too that I remembered that she forgot to include. I wanted to be as correct as I could with everything because I think over the years as we hear stories we don’t quite remember then the way we should.

I spent four days with my Dad Sue before he lost consciousness and then another four days later was taken to the hospital. We use to share a glass of wine together whenever I went to visit my parents. My Dad and I had a great conversation the last night I was there with him before I got some help for my Mom and was able to go home. He told me how proud he was of me, it was a great conversation. He also apologized to me for some things he wish he would have done but didn’t. No words were left unsaid and I wouldn’t trade that time with him for anything.

Thank you Sue, it means a lot.

~Adrienne

74 Sue Neal Twitter: write_clever February 28, 2013 at 2:05 PM

Thanks for sharing those special memories of your last time together with your Dad, Adrienne – I can see how you must treasure those. Your Dad must have loved you very much.

And I think it’s just great that your Mum helped you write this – she must be delighted with the lovely comments you’ve received in response.

Looks to me like you’re a special lady from a very special family.

I hope you’re having a wonderful week,

Sue
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75 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 28, 2013 at 2:15 PM: It’s engraved in my mind Sue, it feels like it was just yesterday. I actually had to spoon feed him the wine but that’s okay. He was very very weak but we had a great talk. I did love him very much and I know he loved me too.

I wanted to have he dates down better and have everything in order. Throughout the years they get messed up you know when you hear them so often. When they’re told second hand a lot of times they don’t come out accurate. Mom hasn’t actually been back by to read the comments but asks me about what people are saying and how many have commented. She’s very surprised that people were interested in this. She doesn’t understand blogging or the relationships I’ve built with people online.

Ah, thank you Sue I appreciate that. I think I’ve got some darn awesome friends online you know! You included young lady.

You have a wonderful end to your week and a fun weekend. I’ll be sure to do the same.

~Adrienne

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76 Julie Barrett Twitter: aclear sign February 25, 2013 at 5:01 PM

Aww Adrienne, what a great story! My Dad is the only main relative I have left and I keep saying I need to get him to do some videos talking about his life and the family history and so NOW I am going to arrange it. I have a terrible memory and I would never be able to put something like this together for him once he is gone. Much love to you and let’s celebrate the life of your wonderful Dad.
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77 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 5:17 PM: Thank you, glad you enjoyed learning about my Dad.

I had my Mom do that about her life and also everyone buried at our family cemetery. I never remember who all those people are and how they’re related to us. We had always wanted Dad to tape some of the stories he use to tell back then but he never would. He was worried about how people would take it today since times were different back then and practical jokes they pulled then, some people may be offended with them today. He didn’t want that on tape but I promise you, they were hilarious and I would have never taken them that way.

Do arrange that Julie because one day you may regret you never did and you can’t pass that down to your kids. My niece and nephew appreciate what they remember about my Dad and I’m so thrilled. I had to have Mom give me a lot of the dates and stuff because I remembered bits and pieces but never the actual dates.

Thank you Julie, glad you enjoyed this post.

~Adrienne

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78 Sue Price Twitter: suejprice February 25, 2013 at 5:35 PM

Hi Adrienne

Thanks for sharing this story and his life with us. I love the old photos of him, he and your Mom and the farm house. It sure was a different era our parents grew up in.

It is sad he had so much illness is his life. Sometimes life seems just damn unfair. I know it would have been heart breaking for you to watch his suffer.

Oh and I missed commenting on the photo of you and your brother and sister. Trust you to be the one with you mouth open So cute.

How does your Mom handle the anniversary? I am sure it gets easier each year but I am sure she too still misses him. It is great she is now near to you.

Take care Adrienne and thanks again for sharing.

Sue
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79 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 5:56 PM: Hi Sue,

My pleasure, I wanted to write this one so people could get to know him better. It was definitely a different era alright!

I know that as kids we didn’t quite understand everything. I was too young to remember the first surgery but I remember the second. Then I was in high school when the rest all started. Life is unfair I agree, we never know the answers to some of this do we Sue!

Yep, that’s definitely me smiling oh so big! You can tell me a mile away.

We both did pretty good. It was a beautiful day here and we took an extra long walk. She actually helped me write this post so I think she appreciated me sharing with all my friends more about who he was since no one really knew be way back then. We talk about him all the time so he’s never forgotten and we still laugh about a lot of things he use to do. He really was something else Sue.

Thank you for your comment, I appreciate that.

~Adrienne

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80 Lisa Magoulas Twitter: lisamagoulasi February 25, 2013 at 5:39 PM

Oh Adrienne, that was beautiful. Your father was an amazing man, he surely was a survivor. No doubt where you get your fire and passion from. And look at your little baby picture, I guess you’ve always been a happy gal. I’m sure your dad is looking down on you and so proud of all you’ve accomplished. This made me think of my own dad. I wish I had gotten his life story before he and my mom passed. You’re a lucky woman. Thanks for sharing.
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81 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 6:00 PM: Thank you Lisa, I really appreciate that! He was a survivor and sometimes had a hard time understanding why he was still here and so many others went before him. That guilt syndrome of being the only one left you know.

I was pretty cute when I was that young. The rest of the years, not so much! lol…

I know he’s proud, he told me that the last time I ever saw him. It means the world to me I had that time with him before he passed.

I am a very lucky woman Lisa. I’ve made my Mom write a bunch of stuff down for me because I’ll never remember it all. I’ve never had a good memory and that woman remembers every single little detail of everything. She can tell you the history of ever relative she’s ever had as well as my Dad. Her mind is amazing. Yikes!!! lol…

Thanks Lisa, I appreciate your comment.

~Adrienne

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82 Raena Lynn Twitter: raenalynntweet1 February 25, 2013 at 6:07 PM

Hi Adrienne,

Thank you for sharing your wonderful story about your Dad! You are so fortunate that you have knowledge of his life and able to share it with others. The pictures sure added a lot of richness to your story. He was an incredible man and I am very impressed with his strength and perseverance through so many health problems. He used his challenging circumstances for helping so many people! He was certainly a man that made lemonade out of lemons. After reading his story, it is obvious to me where you get your toughness and zest for life.:)

I love the way he served in his later years with the Anderson Network. I’m sure he helped a lot of people going though the same trials he endured. This is a story about a truly inspiring man by a truly inspiring daughter! It’s awesome that you are so proud of him!

Raena Lynn

PS You and your sisters were cute babies!
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83 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 6:17 PM: Hey Raena,

Well it was my pleasure, thank you for stopping by and reading it.

I am very fortunate, I’ve heard so many stories over the years and I have my Mom who remembers every single little detail even to this day.

I thought the pictures would add a little something so glad you enjoyed seeing them as well.

Thank you, I’m happy to hear that you think I inherited a lot from him. I certainly like to think so.

He was very dedicated to the Anderson Network and did a lot of good there. He even took Spanish so he could speak to those who didn’t speak English.

I appreciate your comment Raena, thanks so much. Glad you like the photo of me and my sister too! Was that ever a long time ago.

~Adrienne

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84 Barbara Charles Twitter: BarbaraCharles February 25, 2013 at 6:24 PM

Absolutely fabulous story Adrienne. It made me smile and it made me miss my dad who you know I lost not that long ago. Your story made me feel as if I was there and you made him come alive even though I never knew him. He’s sounds like a wonderful man and I know you must miss him terribly. Thank you for sharing his life with us.
Barbara
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85 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 7:32 PM: Thank you Barbara and I’m sorry if I made you miss yours even more. I know it hasn’t been a year yet and that’s still so fresh on your mind. If someone had written this about their Dad after me just losing mine I wouldn’t have been able to read it. Way too emotional for me but it does get easier with time.

I’m glad you felt that you got a sense of who he was, he was an amazing man. I miss him every single day but I talk to him a lot. I feel he’s with me and Mom so that’s very comforting for me.

Thank you for your lovely comment and I hope you have a good night.

~Adrienne

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86 Angela McCall Twitter: angeld0ve February 25, 2013 at 7:30 PM

WOW…Adrienne, your dad is a REMARKABLE man!!! He is a TRUE survivor. He fight for his life and lived. What a real inspiration. No wonder you come out so beautiful. Your dad is just wonderful. And so you’re the MIDDLE child…wow!!! You’re CUTE as a button.

I heard that “middle” child are usually the AMBASSADOR. And you are!

Thank you so much for sharing us your dad story. This is truly precious. And I understand the feeling. This can get sentimental specially if you are close to him.

Angela
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87 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 25, 2013 at 7:35 PM: Thank you Angela, I believe he was a remarkable man. He wouldn’t have thought so but not many people would have been able to handle what he did so beautifully. We’re so fortunate to have had him for so long.

Yep, I’m the middle child and the caregiver of the family. I was the one they always called when they needed something and I was there with him at the beginning of the end. Just happy to have been there for him.

Ah, thank you for reading it today and for your lovely comment. I can’t believe it’s been 10 years now. Wow!

I appreciate your comment Angela, thanks so much.

~Adrienne

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88 Corina Ramos Twitter: wfhconcepts February 25, 2013 at 10:16 PM

Thank you for sharing this story about your father. He sounded like a wonderful, caring person and I can tell how much you love him and admired him and you’ve written a beautiful tribute to him.

I have both my parents and their health is slowly starting to dwindle. My dad was just released from the hospital this morning after having heart attack symptoms. I’ve never been more afraid in my life. My dad is my hero and I’m not ready to lose him. As always God is good and he won this round so I told him to think of this as a sign from God he needs to take better care of himself.

It sounds like you take after your dad with that lively spirit. When you described his sense of humor I scrolled back up to your picture and figured out the little girl who is all smiles and giddy in the picture is you

You must have had a strong connection with your dad like the one I had with my grandmother. On the night she passed away I was sitting in her rocker and talking to her. When I was done talking and weeping, I asked her to give me a sign to let me know she heard me and wouldn’t you know it we had a black out on our block? I was the most beautiful black out I had ever gone through

Thank you for reminding us to hug our parents and care for them while we still have them. This was a beautiful post.
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89 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:21 AM: Thank you Cori, I really appreciate that.

Oh wow, he was just released this morning and I sure hope he listens to what you said because I do believe that it’s God giving him another chance at life and I’m sure he’s not ready to check out yet either. I sure wasn’t ready to lose my Dad when I did.

I do enjoy life so I believe I inherited that from him. The funny thing is in most pictures we could never get him to smile. The ones of him cracking up though, that’s his natural funny self.

Wow, that’s something else about the night you lost your grandmother. I don’t know if I’ve ever had anything like that before. I do know that when he was in hospice he had been unconscious for about a week by then and he was looking really scruffy. We knew he would hate for people to see him like that so we asked the nurses to shave him. After they did that he made a sound which he hadn’t done at all so we knew he was happy about that.

My pleasure because I never want anyone to have any words left unsaid. We never know when our time will come and I know too many people who never told their parents what they wanted to before they passed. I don’t wish that on anyone.

Thank you Cori and you have a wonderful day and tell your parents I said Hi!

~Adrienne

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90 Karthik Twitter: PCdiggerdotcom February 25, 2013 at 11:08 PM

Hey Adrienne, This is really an awesome share. Your father must be a really great man and I regret not knowing him before. My parents are getting older and even though they are healthy, they aren’t the same as they were a few years back. There is a quote that ” old age is nothing but childhood again”. I love my parents so much more than anybody and really hate to see people sending their parents to old age homes. We wouldn’t be who we are today if it wasn’t for them. I really pray for the long lives for my parents and all other parents. Love your dad and mom, you are their only world. Understand that before its late!
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91 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:25 AM: Hi Karthik,

My father was a really great man Karthik, I definitely thought so.

They do revert back to childhood for the most part. My Dad did, totally dependent on us. Now I know that old age homes are something that may need to happen for some people because there comes a time we can’t take care of them the way we wish we could. My parents felt they would need to go into a home eventually because of my Dad’s failing health because they didn’t want to burden us to take care of them. That never happened thank goodness.

Just be sure to let your parents know how much they mean to you while they’re still here.

I appreciate your wonderful comment, thank you so much.

~Adrienne

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92 Liza Twitter: prettysweetly February 26, 2013 at 3:43 AM

Your dad reminds me of my great grandmother. She lived to be about 95 or 96 and beat cancer at least three times, plus continued going stroke after stroke. She was a very strong person, and I admired her for that.

I like the closeness you had with your dad; I have that with my dad as well.

Thanks for sharing this. :]
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93 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:28 AM: Sounds like your grandmother was one tough cookie Liza. Good for her, she wasn’t ready to give up on life. Sounds like you two were very close.

So happy to hear you’re close to your Dad too. Tell him you love him as often as you can girl. It’s hell when they’re gone.

Thanks Liza, I appreciate your lovely comment.

~Adrienne

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94 Annie André Twitter: annieandrehacks February 26, 2013 at 5:04 AM

This was beautifully told Adrienne. It’s such a great thing to celebrate his life rather than his death. I am amazed at all the ailments he had from birth onward. It’s proof that sometimes if we have the will we can will ourselves to overcome so many things and in your dads case illness. I wish I knew as much about my dad as you do yours. My dad died over 20 years ago when I was 20 and I never got a chance to get to know him as an adult. It’s very painful for me to think about.. Anyways, you did a wonderful job keeping me on the edge of my seat with his life story. It was like reading a short biography.
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95 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:31 AM: Hi Annie

Ah, thank you for your wonderful comment. I really appreciate that. He was definitely a fighter and in my other post I shared about him he had an experience that just lifted his faith so he knew everything would be okay so he never worried about things after that. I mean it is out of our hands but worrying about it just makes it worse.

I’m sorry you didn’t know much about your Dad. That would be horrible in my opinion but I guess that’s the life that was dealt us right. My Dad told us so many stories growing up that although I remember so much, I’m glad we have Mom here to remind us of exactly how they go. That woman has a memory like you wouldn’t believe even at 87 years old. She amazes me.

Glad you enjoy my post about my Dad Annie. I really appreciate that.

~Adrienne

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96 Gladys Twitter: coachgladyscruz February 26, 2013 at 8:11 AM

My My My where do I start Adrienne
First of all, thank you for making us a part of your world. As I read your article, I experienced so many emotions for you and for myself. There is no better way to celebrate the man you loved then inviting us to celebrate with you. Forthat I say thank you.

Adrienne… You sure do look like your dad. You are precious and the smile on both of your faces speaks volumes to me. As you shared your experiences regarding your dad, I moved in my heart because I have lost both of my parents. My mom was a treasure to me and my dad, well I learned how to forgive him, and loved them both right to the end. Enough of me, back to you. Your memories of him, will always keep him alive within your heart.
Thank you for shareing a Heartfelt experience. Yes Celebrate his Life, and who he was and who he is to you today.
I am going to take a guess about the picture… I will say the smallest one is you???

Again, Adrienne what can I say…. My heart is moved with the Love you have for your dad.

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97 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:35 AM: Hi Gladys,

I really appreciate you saying that, I wasn’t quite sure how this would be received. We know that most of what we share shouldn’t be about us but at times I think it’s kind of necessary. Although it wasn’t about me, it was about my Dad but I just knew I would write this at this time.

He would love that you think I look like him. He was such a ham! lol…

I’m glad that you had that peace with your parents although I’m sorry that they’re no longer with you. I know that’s hard. I will always have the memories, you’re right about that and we have plenty of pictures and video as well. Oh and a cassette tape of him talking around the table at his sisters.

I’m the one smiling so much Gladys! My brother is the smallest one, he was the baby of the family.

Thank you for your lovely comment, I appreciate that.

~Adrienne

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98 Neamat Tawadrous Twitter: nkeriakos February 26, 2013 at 11:57 AM

Hi Adrienne,

What a great touching story! It brought tears to my eyes. You had a great loving Dad and your post made me feel as if I know him. You brought all the memories to life and I can tell how proud you are to have such a great Dad.

I lost both my parents at a young age. I lost my Dad 23 years ago and I lost my Mom 15 years ago. And I liked your last statement that if you have a parent, make sure to call them and say you love them because one day that will not be possible. That’s very true.

I also loved your picture with your brother and sister and it is very easy to tell which one is you. The one with the big smile.

Thanks Adrienne for such a great post celebrating the memory of your Dad and it brought me also to remember my Dad and Mom.

Be Blessed,

Neamat
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99 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 12:32 PM: Hi Neamat,

Thank you and I’m so happy to hear that you enjoyed reading about my Dad. I know that people said the same thing at his memorial service that they felt like they had known him just through all the stories that had been told. That definitely makes me smile pretty big sitting here reading your comment Neamat.

Oh, I’m so very sorry you lost both your parents and at a young age. How heartbreaking that must have been for you. I have so many friends who have lost their husband at an early age and they have young children. I can’t imagine what it’s like growing up without a parent. I was so blessed to have my Dad as long as I did.

That’s my favorite picture of us Neamat. I know, I guess that’s proof that I’ve always been like that right!

I appreciate your wonderful comment and glad that you were able to remember your parents too. I hope those who still have both of theirs will let them know how important they are to them. I still have my Mom so I won’t ever let her forget it.

~Adrienne

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100 Mayura Twitter: MayuraDeSilva February 26, 2013 at 12:29 PM

Hi Adrienne,

Seems like you couldn’t resist smiling since your childhood as the above photo definitely shows who’s the little Adrienne there

The first most photo of your father implies how fun and loving person he is I remember cover photo you had that includes photos of your parents. I haven’t read the previous post about your father as it was written in 2011 where I was never around here, but I just did.

You don’t wanna stop writing about him. Do you? This is a beautiful post filled with love of a grateful daughter. He’s a very impressive and courageous person to live 80 years while beating all his sicknesses and pains. I feel it’s the people know about pain will help others the most and I really can’t think about how could he able to handle it by himself Adrienne. I love to know that your father never complaint but shared unconditional kindness. I’m sure your mother has been a very supportive role in his life including you and your siblings. I think your brother is like him as he rides the ships too

I have no doubt that everyone here have been touched by the story of your father Adrienne I have my parents and I’m much lucky to have most of loved ones around me. Especially my mother. You are indeed a lucky person to have a such caring father and look at you, I can see him waving back and being proud to be your father after all.

Thank you so much for sharing your father’s story and especially sharing those lovely photos Adrienne They made the post more colorful and even more alive. I really love this one.

Sending blessings to you and your family incl. Kayla dear

Take care.

Cheers…
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101 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 12:40 PM: Hi Mayura,

Yeah, I did start at a young age it seems. See, I have proof too Mayura!

My Dad was a cut up, he loved to joke around. He was a really funny guy and could keep you laughing with stories he would tell. I have so many of those fabulous memories with him. I’m glad you read the post I wrong a couple years ago about him Mayura, I appreciate that and hope you enjoyed that one as well.

I’ve only written about him twice now and I might again someday. I still have my Mom to share some things about too because she’s a trooper as well and a huge support for my Dad. For their 50th wedding anniversary he wrote her a letter and it took him forever to read it because he was so emotional trying to share what he had wrote to her. Had it not been for her he probably wouldn’t have lived as long as he did. She was definitely his rock and she made sure he did what the doctor’s told him to do. He did have faith and loved to help others and he taught that you have to leave it in the hands of God because it’s definitely out of ours.

I’m happy to hear that you have both your parents Mayura and that you’re especially close to your Mom. I am a very lucky lady I admit having the parents that I did and as long as I did.

Thank you Mayura for your lovely comment and I appreciate it so much. I’m glad you enjoyed my post and the photos I shared too. I thought it would give you more of a sense of who he was, and my Mom too!

I’ll be sure to tell Kayla you’re sending your love.

~Adrienne

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102 Aditya Twitter: being_chirpy February 26, 2013 at 12:43 PM

Hi Adrienne,

I’m sorry for your loss and there is always the daughter-father connection that makes it all the more special.

What a glorious life he has had, a thorough gentleman he is and I’m glad you’ve celebrated his life with us. It is so inspiring that even after heralding a severe case of pneumonia, he went back to school. Just disappointing that such a chirpy man was held back by diseases and I’m stunned that he put them aside and lived life to the fullest.

Everyone in some point of their lives goes through a major depression and the best part is you’ve recovered and your online success is a proof that you have his blessings with you always.

I’m guessing you’re the one on the right? All brilliant photos!

Aditya
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103 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 2:42 PM: Hi Aditya,

Thank you for your wonderful comment, I truly appreciate it. Yep, I was a Daddy’s girl for sure.

He did move through all the illnesses, surgeries and times he was told he wouldn’t make it all to live to be 80 years old. We are all so very blessed to have had him this long so it was a great life with him. I wanted more but that wasn’t to be obviously.

I’m definitely on the right, yep!

Thank you Aditya again for your comment, I appreciate it.

~Adrienne

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104 Tonya Stephens Twitter: gulfcoastbeauty February 26, 2013 at 4:01 PM

Hi Adrienne,
What a wonderful tribute to your Dad. It sounds like you hit the jackpot with your parents!
The picture of you kids is precious and of course you were a stand out even as a small child, you must have gotten the outgoing- fun loving gene from your Dad.
I really enjoyed this story about your Dad and his life…wonderful writing…thank you.
You know if someone has that many people at their funeral it proves they really lived a great life because when you give….you get.
Tonya
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105 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:16 PM: Hi Tonya,

Why thank you. Like a lot of people, we didn’t appreciate them as much until we became adults and understood why they did a lot of what they did. The lessons we all had to learn as kids and stuff.

I like to think so Tonya, thanks. I do love to have fun.

I appreciate that you enjoyed reading about my Dad. Thank you so much.

We were very surprised with the turnout at his service mainly due to the horrible weather we had on that day but that just went to show you how many people he truly touched.

Thank you again Tonya for your lovely comment.

~Adrienne

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106 Shannon Twitter: TheHeavyPurse February 26, 2013 at 5:28 PM

Oh, Adrienne – what a beautiful post and such a tribute to your father who had such an amazing spirit. I lost my father almost 10 years ago and I still miss him every day. He was an inspiration to me and I credit for developing my passion for financial literacy.

Fathers and daughters have such a special bond. He would be so proud of you, but I think you already know that. Thank you for sharing such a personal story with us. An excellent reminder that in the end, what really matters most is how we loved.
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107 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:21 PM: Hi Shannon,

Why thank you for your lovely comment and for dropping by my blog and reading this particular post. It’s pretty special to me mainly because you said it in your comment. Fathers and daughter have that special bond, at least we did.

So you lost yours around the same time I did or at least 10 years ago. My Mom and I went to my brothers tonight for dinner and he had asked me if I had a recording of him. He wanted to hear his voice again and I just so happened to have one of him back in 1999. We sat around the table listening to it and gosh, it was almost like he was right there with us. How I do miss that man.

Thank you for sharing this with me Shannon, it means a lot. Yes, an excellent reminder of what’s truly important in our lives and trust me, when you get to the end of yours people will only wish they would have spent more time telling the people they love how much they meant to them. I’m sure my loved ones get really tired of hearing it. Oh well!

~Adrienne

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108 Carolyn Twitter: wonderoftech February 26, 2013 at 6:19 PM

Hi Adrienne, I read this amazing tribute to your father yesterday and I’ve been thinking about it nonstop ever since. Our fathers had very similar childhoods, but my father had the gift of health. They really were the Greatest Generation weren’t they? Living through the Depression and serving in World War II.

What a remarkable man he was, Adrienne. I remember the last post you wrote about him and as soon as I opened that post and saw his picture, I knew he had to be your father. He had your delightful smile!

How wonderful of you to celebrate your father on the anniversary of his death by sharing this special tribute to him. I felt as if I knew him from this wonderful mini-biography of his life.

I don’t know if you watched Big Brother during Season 3, but the Korean contestant celebrated the anniversary of his father’s death by eating his father’s favorite meal. Big Brother arranged for him to have the meal that evening. After that episode, which was immediately before the anniversary of my mother’s death, my sister and I resolved to celebrate the anniversary of our mother’s death by having her favorite meal: lobster and artichokes. Luckily, my daughters will be eating the same meal because that’s my and my sister’s favorite meal too!

Have you ever heard of this tradition, Adrienne? What was your father’s favorite meal?

Thanks so much for sharing your very special memories with us, Adrienne!
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109 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:29 PM: Well hey Carolyn,

Oh, you’ve been thinking about my post about my Dad! I bet our parents did have similar backgrounds but I’m thrilled to hear that your Dad was in much better health. I know that the younger generation doesn’t “get” how we grew up and I remember hearing stories of how my parents grew up. A totally different era indeed.

In the photo at the top of this post, my Dad was cutting up in the front of his house with his cousin Jean. When I scanned it in she was too washed out to even tell who it was so I didn’t include her but they were having such a fun time. It’s one of my favorite photos of him. Just being silly.

I’m really glad that you felt you knew him from what I shared. I have so many wonderful stories of him and one of my favorites my brother actually told at his service. That’s why people walked up to us afterwards saying that they felt they’d always known him. I’m glad you got that same feeling.

I didn’t start watching Big Brother I think until around Season 4, it could have been 3 but I don’t remember that. I’ve never heard of that tradition nor have I ever thought of doing that. Wow, my parents both have a lot of foods they loved and they didn’t really have a favorite. The funny thing about my Dad is that later in life he lost his sense of smell and taste. He just knew that the food tasted good without actually tasting it. What a combination Carolyn, lobster and artichokes. But I bet you’re glad it’s your favorite too now.

I appreciate you coming back again Carolyn and sharing this with me. You gave me something to ponder now. I’ll have to ask Mom if she or Dad really had an all time favorite. There was so much we all really liked. Thanks for sharing that.

~Adrienne

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110 Manickam Vijayabanu Twitter: mediacrayon February 26, 2013 at 7:30 PM

Hi Adrienne,

A wonderful tribute to your dad!. While I read, had a feeling like, I went to your home town and lived over there. The pictures, narration..I can feel every line comes from your bottom of the heart and truly inspiring to know about your dad. His humor, fun and courage to fight against cancer all just simply great and truly touch my heart.

In our universe, Certain things there is no substitution. The first and ever, is our wonderful Parents. To anyone, who got a opportunity to have their parents to become a friend, are really gifted and blessed. The secure, friendly, caring, love and warmth feeling can be infused only by great parents and sure you were gifted. Indeed, I am away from my home country almost 9 years now, and greatly missing my parents and their love and affection. We all met just only few times at past years and kind of my job nature, family life and career keep pushing me to move ahead and parted away me from home town. Certain things we sacrifice doesn’t have any replacement and always priceless. Its very hard to digest and I can feel it.

Well. Back to your photo question – My answer would be – “Eating sugar No Paapa” :)

Thanks a lot for sharing the emotional post Adrienne.
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111 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 26, 2013 at 9:35 PM: Hi Manickam,

I’m happy to know that you felt like you were there with me as I told of his story.

I was blessed with great parents. As I look back over my childhood and adult life I am truly blessed. We had a pretty normal upbringing, my parents were married for 52 years when my Dad passed away and I never heard them yell, argue or scream at each other. I’m sure they did but they never did it around us or in ear shot. They were very strict with us and they were extremely budget conscious so I grew up with that lack mentality never understanding why. They were raised in the depression so that was just a way of life for them.

Throughout my life I’d been asked to move away a few times but I refused. I wanted to be close to my parents even if I did live in a different town. I didn’t want to have to hop on a plane and fly for hours to get to them if something happened and as you have read, it did pretty much my entire life. I have no regrets with that and I sure hope you don’t either. We have to live our lives for ourselves, that’s just a path I personally chose.

Thank you again for your comment Manickam!

~Adrienne

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112 Carol Lynn Twitter: carollynnrivera February 27, 2013 at 9:30 AM

What a beautiful tribute, Adrienne. Your dad was persistent, that’s for sure! I can’t believe he went through so much for so long and he still had a wonderful life with a family and a career and he fought for his health to see it all. I bet a lot of people would have given up pretty early. Your dad is an inspiration to anyone who thinks their life isn’t going the way they want it to and for all those people who complain about everything without appreciating what they have.

Well, now I know where you get your positive attitude and determination from! A lot of your dad rubbed off on you, that’s for sure. And you have to tell me which one in the photo is you… the left?

I have to admit I don’t know a lot about my dad’s past. I know snippets of things (mostly about him getting in trouble!) but now you’ve got me wondering if I could put together a memory as nice as this. So you inspired me to do some more talking to my parents!

I love your photos, Adrienne, and I loved this tribute. I know it was hard to lose your dad but you have so many great stories and memories, so enjoy them.
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113 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 27, 2013 at 9:45 AM

Thank you Carol, I appreciate that.

Of course we didn’t learn until later in life how sick he even was as a child. I wasn’t even 2 when he got cancer for the first time so it’s all we ever knew. My Mom use to get so upset with him when they would go to the doctor because she was a nervous wreck waiting to hear how he was doing and if it was back or not. He would be sound asleep in the chair. He told her to stop worrying because there’s nothing they can do about it. He was so right!

He definitely gave me hell every time I complained about something because I could be really worse off you know. Laying up in a hospital bed dying of cancer and here I was complaining about petty stuff. It was a good wake up call that’s for sure.

The left? You can’t tell that I’m the one smiling on the right! I’m surprised Carol!

I’m so happy that I’ve inspired you Carol to have those conversations with your parents and learn more about their upbringing. If we don’t find these things out while they’re here we’ll never know about them when they’re gone. I hope they’ll be open to sharing that with you.

Thank you Carol for sharing that. It was the hardest thing that I’ve ever been through but it’s behind me, he’s gone and you’re right, I have all those wonderful memories up until he was 80 years old. Most people don’t so we were truly blessed.

~Adrienne

114 Carol Lynn Twitter: carollynnrivera February 27, 2013 at 12:15 PM

ahaha! You know, I thought… I bet she’s the happy one laughing but then I second guessed myself because the one on the left has your eyes so I went on that

Ok, next time I’ll go with my first instinct!
Carol Lynn recently posted..Money Can’t Buy (Brand) Love

115 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 27, 2013 at 1:22 PM: Yep, I’m definitely the happy one laughing and of course the one of the left is my older sister. We both have Mom’s eyes but I got the lower part of my Dad.

You still did good Carol!

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116 Tim Bonner Twitter: timbo1973 February 27, 2013 at 10:28 AM

Hey Adrienne

What an amazing person your father must have been.

It must have been tough to have so many health problems with such a young family and then have them recurring throughout your life. It’s takes someone really strong to get through all of that and come through okay on the other side. You obviously grew up in a very happy and solid family.

Both of my parents are still alive and are relatively young. I always catch up with them on a weekly basis. They live back in England, a good 6 hours drive away. Between us though, we travel up and down to visit a few times a year. My parents were last in Edinburgh in January for my sons birthday and we will be travelling down to see them at Easter.

My father-in-law passed away a couple of years ago and I know it was a difficult time for my wife. In his latter years he suffered from Alzheimers. It was a slow and steady decline at first but in the end, he didn’t really know anyone and couldn’t speak. At least my daughter got to meet her granddad just before he passed away. I know that was important to my wife.

What a fantastic post Adrienne. Truly inspiring and I am thankful that I still have my parents around. I have no idea what it will feel like when I don’t.
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117 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 27, 2013 at 10:45 AM: Hi Tim,

Thank you, he was pretty amazing I think.

I can’t imagine having to go through what he did because back in those days they weren’t even as advanced as they are now. He definitely had faith and left it in his hands. He just kept a positive attitude and did what he was told. Obviously those were the right steps to take.

I’m glad you still have both your parents and they are rather young. I hope they are both in good health too. It’s great you get to see them often, I think that’s important not only for you but for your kids too. I lost all of my grandparents pretty close together but I was up in my 30′s by then. I had them a pretty long time and was close to them all. Unfortunately though, my Dad lost his Dad when I was only three. I never knew him accept through stories.

I’m sure that was very hard on your wife losing her Dad to Alzheimers. We are blessed that doesn’t run in our family and I’m so thankful. I couldn’t imagine my parents not knowing me. That would be so so hard. I’ve seen plenty of people dealing with that though, my sister-in-law’s mother has it and to watch them sink inside themselves is just horrible.

Thank you Tim, glad you enjoyed it and I appreciate you sharing this with me. Give your parents a call and tell them how much you love them even though they probably know. We never know what life will bring us.

Thanks Tim and hope you’re enjoying your week.

~Adrienne

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118 Stacy Twitter: growwithstacy February 27, 2013 at 1:07 PM

Hi Adrienne,

I’m very sorry for your loss. These types of anniversaries are really bittersweet. We stop to remember all of the good memories, but are also reminded about another year passing since we last saw them.

Your dad sounds like he was a truly wonderful person! That’s not a surprise, considering how great you turned out. I really enjoyed the pictures that you shared. He reminds me of my grandpa, who was laid to rest on his 90th birthday two and a half years ago.

Have a blessed week,
Stacy
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119 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 27, 2013 at 1:25 PM: Hi Stacy,

Thank you Stacy and you’re right. With each year that passes we get further and further away from remembering their voice or how it use to be with them around. I don’t think I’ll ever forget those memories and luckily for me, I have a tape of him talking with some relatives. We listened to that last night by the way.

I appreciate that, that’s so sweet of you to say and he’s be very proud to hear that too. Wow, your granddad lived to be 90. So did mine but I lost him about 24 years ago. What a great man he was too! We’re so very blessed to have had them that long aren’t we! I’m sorry for your loss as well. We had the pleasure of having them throughout our adult life.

Thank you Stacy for your wonderful comment.

~Adrienne

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120 Chery Schmidt Twitter: cheryschmidt February 27, 2013 at 9:55 PM

What a Wonderful Post Adrienne, I am headed to spend some time with my parents this weekend and Yes I will give them an extra Big Hug because of you. Thanks you for sharing your day with us. Chery
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121 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 February 28, 2013 at 8:39 AM: I love hearing you’re going to spend some time with your parents this weekend Chery! Please do give them an extra big hug. You are truly blessed to still have them both. Thank you so much for sharing that with me. It does put a smile on my face.

~Adrienne

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122 Michael A. Buccilli Twitter: mbtalent2 February 28, 2013 at 9:09 PM

Adrienne; I want to thank you for giving us such a wonderful gift – yes, this post was a gift. I sincerely believe that when we take the time to share with others about our family members we are sharing a piece of who we are.

Your post is well explained and shows the wonderful, fighting spirit that your dad had and I can sure understand now where your excitement for life comes from. I again thank you for sharing a piece of your life with us.
Michael A. Buccilli recently posted..The Beauty Of Clouds

123 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 March 1, 2013 at 10:12 AM: Hi Michael,

Glad you had time to stop by and you enjoyed this post. I think when we share some things that are more personal from time to time it gives our readers a peak into who we are more. I was just glad to share this with everyone on this unfortunate anniversary.

I appreciate your comment Michael and thank you for stopping by.

~Adrienne

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124 Beth Hewitt Twitter: simpblognetwork March 1, 2013 at 4:57 PM

Hey Adrienne,

What a beautiful post. You can tell that your father was a lovely man you can see it in his eyes and smile. For someone who had been through so much, he certainly seemed to want to live his life to the full. Thank-you for sharing aspects of your personal life. I can understand why you are proud of your father.

Beth
Beth Hewitt recently posted..Let’s get Personal (with our blogs!)

125 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 March 1, 2013 at 5:26 PM: Hi Beth,

Well thanks for stopping by, I appreciate that. Yep, this one was pretty special to me cause he was a special kind of guy.

He had a tough life but a lot to live for so it was hard to bring him down.

Thank you for your comment, I appreciate that.

Enjoy your weekend.

~Adrienne

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126 Heru Prasetyono Twitter: hprasetyono March 1, 2013 at 7:43 PM

Father is the first person we must respect and obey beside mother of course. I am very proud of you because You respect your father very much despite you reach your successful and be a successful woman in my opinion. I am very sorry to be late to know this but I like you are willing to share about your personal experience about your father. It means we are close and you trust us. Thank you very much for sharing.
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127 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 March 2, 2013 at 10:52 AM: Hi Heru,

I think they are equally important Heru, the father doesn’t require more respect then the mother. Not in my opinion that is because being a woman, I know we rule the roost.

I know that I’ve gotten to where I am in my life through the lessons I’ve learned. A good bit of them I learned from my father but I learned a heck of a lot from my Mom too thank goodness. He was just a huge figure in my life and someone I loved dearly. On this particular anniversary I did want to share with my readers more of who he was. I’m glad you enjoyed reading this, thank you so much.

~Adrienne

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128 Cynthia Twitter: richlymiddlecla March 1, 2013 at 10:20 PM

Your father was an amazing man. I will have to say this is on of the most wonderful post that I have ever read. Thank you so much for sharing about your wondeful father. He was truly an amazing man.
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129 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 March 2, 2013 at 10:55 AM: Thank you Cynthia, I think so too!

I appreciate that and it was just sharing with my readers who he was because I talk about him often. We learn so much from our parents you know and through his struggles with his health I’ve learned just how precious life is and how arguing about all the petty little stuff is so insignificant in the grander scheme of things. He was an amazing man and I’m honored to be his daughter.

Thank you for your comment Cynthia, it means the world.

~Adrienne

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130 James March 5, 2013 at 11:45 PM

Hi Asdrienne, your dad is a great inspiration for those who are struggling for their life. I found him really strong if not physically but mentally to overcome so many hurdles. He was continuously being pulled down by life but he never gave up, he fell down, stood up and ran again, and that too for a good 80 years. I like him, thanks for sharing, may God bless his soul.

131 Adrienne Twitter: adriennesmith40 March 6, 2013 at 9:19 AM: Thank you James for your very kind words. He was a great guy and had a hard life but made the best of it and helped a lot of people along the way. That’s a life to be proud of.

Thank you for your comment, it’s greatly appreciated.

~Adrienne

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Some Anniversaries Are Not Worth Celebrating

Born In The Depression

School In The Country

World War II

After The War

The First Dose Of Cancer

A Golfing Nut

Life As He Knew It

Remembering My Dad

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